Bonjour! Comment allez-vous?

I hope you all have had a lovely April as I know none of you have heard from me! Spring showers are definitely in full force here, but to think that May is in 2 days and summer is quickly approaching is the craziest thing I’ve heard yet…

So, with the approach of May, it comes time to face my impending departure from France. I hope to post another blog post before I go, but know that if ANYone wants to talk about Study Abroad or France once I return, I will be more than willing as I can only imagine how much my friends and family are going to be listening to my stories for months to come.

I spent my spring break in a few different places. Seeing Jackie and Efi and trying new foods and listening to new languages were incredible experiences, and the 3 week “euro-tour” as my host mom likes to call it, concluded with my mom and brother Tony coming to visit me! We pondered Paris as we took in the sights, foods, and tourists, then trekked it by train to Normandy to see the D-Day beaches (powerful), then imagined the luxury life at Versailles before venturing East to the place I’ve been calling home for 9 months. My mom and Tony stayed with my host family and I for a few days, which was amazing and slightly awkward because my mom and Tony don’t speak any French, and half of my host family speaks very little English. So that was an experience! But overall, it was an amazing time being able to show my family around Strasbourg and even better that they got to meet my host family. When they left, I was hit with saddness, though I knew it would be one short month until I saw them again. It also brought feelings of “ready to go home,” which is hard to fight as the Holy Cross students start leaving the 8th of May, while I am here until the 24th. This experience has been the absolute best, with all its up and downs, but the familiarity of home and comfort of family, friends, and English is pulling at my heart. However, my mom’s leaving reminded me of my own impending departure and I immediately was saddened by the thought of leaving my host family. But as a friend said, “you can always go back” and I know that there will be a place in their hearts for me, which is a beautiful thing!

So what’s in store for the next few weeks? Well, for starters: exams. One for French language and another in French, but about Art History, yikes. Then comes a family vacation with my host fam to Bourgogne- I am so so excited. After that, seeing as I have 2 more weeks with no classes or responsibilities, I will be jetting off to the beach with a few Holy Cross students in the South of France! Then it’s my final week in France which will be largely enjoying Strasbourg and family dinners before I leave for a Scouts Weekend and then leave France for the United States.

Bear with me for these next few weeks as things are bound to get messy and emotional, but in the end, that’s how life goes: c’est la vie. 🙂

Jess

Greetings,

It is now March, the sun is deciding to shine a little more, and despite the brief encounter with snow a few days ago, the weather seems to be getting nicer! As I rode by bike yesterday to tutor and have dinner chez a friend of my host mom, I realized how exciting and beautiful Strasbourg will be in the spring!

These past two weeks have been interesting for me. One one hand, it has been strange thinking of the time I have left in France. When I sit at my desk on a Friday and have not much to do, I miss my family and friends and feel like two and a half more months is the perfect amount of time to spend here, but when I am laughing and chatting with my host sister Jeanne in preparation for her English exam, I find myself dreading the day I will have to leave, feeling like I could stay forever. Speaking of my host family, I have really been reflecting on how much they mean to me and what an impact they have had on me. This past weekend was full of involvement with the Scouts and my french family, events like my first McDonalds in France (somehow made me homesick?) with my host brothers and attending a talk  with my host mom that was given by an ex-terrorist whose heart was converted by Jesus. I was sort of exhausted at the end of the weekend, but I thoroughly enjoyed my time with them. And this week hasn’t ceased to be busy! I have been incredibly lucky to be involved and fully immersed in the culture and society here, as I had events at the campus ministry center, my weekly faith formation group, and dinner with my host mom’s friend lined up for the week!

The Gospel Singers from South Africa that accompanied the speaker, Steven Lungu (turns out I forgot to take a picture of the actual speaker!)

This week, or rather the middle of last week, also gave me an opportunity to be honest with myself and share some of my experience with someone here. Feeling very stuck with God, I went to St. Jean’s church where there is an American priest my friend introduced me to a few weeks ago. He was super nice and really seemed to understand what I was feeling, and I ended up telling him a lot more about life here in France than just my spiritual struggle. I realized that talking to the right person is often an exercise in reflection, and I really appreciated talking about life with Fr. Bradford. With his help, I realized that God’s plans and answers to our prayers are often not what we expect, and I began to reason that though I have been feeling a little lost as an international student who lives far from all the other students, I have been very immersed in this city and made my own friends who, though aren’t English speaking, are varied nationalities and are very awesome. It has been a gift to get to know each one of them, and I realized that God gave me exactly what I needed, though it was different than I expected. Speaking with Father Bradford also helped me to realize how much of a blessing my host family is, though I did know that, it was good to remind myself. He also gave me an amazing opportunity to spend Easter with the Community of Jerusalem, which is honestly a dream, and I’ll be with one of my closest friends here!!

This experience is seriously the best I’ve ever had in terms of being hard but rewarding and challenging but so much fun. Thanks for coming along for the ride:)

Love and Peace,

Jessica

Salam! Bonjour! Hello!

Pont Neuf, Toulouse

This past week was our “winter” break (even though Holy Cross’s spring break is in 2 weeks…) and I took the trip of a lifetime with Erin and Steph. We first ventured to Toulouse, “La ville en rose” or the pink city, in the south of France. It was wonderful to see another part of France and be able to speak the language with the habitants as well as just take some time to venture around and not have to be somewhere all the time. Toulouse is also where my host family used to live, so it was cool thinking that they were here for a while before moving to Strasbourg!

La ville en rose

On Thursday, we woke up at 4am to make our way to the Toulouse airport where we boarded a plane to Marrakech, Morocco, in Africa!! The excitement over seeing another part of the world so different from Europe and America was tangible, and upon arriving over the airport, the differences were unimaginable. Just looking at the landscape from an airplane, you could see the browns and reds of the Moroccan desert and sand, compared to the numerous green fields of France. Getting off the plane, the air was still chilly, but the sun was warm, and from the first site of the airport, everything was written first in Arabic (which is symbols) and then in French, as Morocco used to be a French colony. We booked this trip with a group run for student tours, so we met our guides and exchanged our Euros for Moroccan Dirhams, which were about 10 for each euro. Then we got in a taxi and drove through the loud and disarrayed streets of Marrkech.

On the trip, the tour definitely allowed us the most out of our experience. We stayed in a hostel Riad, which is a old wealthy traditional Moroccan house. It was definitely the most amazing hostel I will ever stay at! Then we took to the streets for a Moroccan lunch of tajines, visited a wood artisan shop and a rug maker, and gathered at the end of the day for a traditional dinner, complete with Moroccan mint tea. The next day we truly “profité-bien” from a visit to a Berber (native Moroccan tribe) house, a ride on a camel, and a hike through the Atlas Mountains. It was exhilarating and truly breath-taking. The adventures didn’t stop there though, as the next day we went dune buggying in the desert! At one point while maneuvering my dune buggy around the rocks of the desert mountain we were climbing, I had to remind myself that this is real, that this experience is truly my study abroad reality and that it is safe to say I am living the dream. I couldn’t help but give praise to the God who brought me on this amazing trip not only to Morocco but to France for this year, and all the blessings that have rained down since.

Equity Point Hostel- Converted Riad

The Atlas Mountains

SIte of the Berber House

Moroccan Museum

Seeing Morocco was truly eye-opening. It struck me for the first time that I have really only seen one view of the world- through the eyes of the West, and how there is so much more to discover and see. I found myself wishing I could have had more time in Morocco and that I am feeling a call to see more of the world after this study abroad experience. I know that it will teach me more about myself, about God, and about life in general. And for that, I am so excited.

Love and Peace,

Jessica

Salut!

So I just updated you on my voyage and hopefully you enjoyed that little window into my travels! If not, I have a little life reflection ready for you, so here we go:)

I already recounted my story of coming back from the United States and going to Paris and feeling homesick and anxious and feeling better later when I back home in Strasbourg. It’s been about a month since then. In some ways it feels short but in others, it feels like a lifetime ago that I was in the US or that I came back here! Since January 1st, I have struggled through picking classes, which hopefully has been settled with a nice occasion of being chastised by a professor for not understanding her class. Now that it’s over, I feel a lot better about the classes I am in! I am learning a lot about art and paintings, wine from Alsace, and very little about the jobs in the church (aka subjects of my classes). But that’s okay, time will tell how it all goes. My host family has been really good, I’ve been helping Jeanne with her English homework, Martin and I chat about traveling and pronunciation of French words, and everyone else is doing well, too! I got a babysitting job basically from God, as it fell into my lap so bizarrely but has been working out really well. Also, I became a cheftaine, or leader, for a Girl Scout troop! Kinda crazy and long sortie days, but it makes me more passionate for the scouts than ever before, and I can’t wait to continue in the US! I have a sortie with the girls and the other leaders today and will sport the entire uniform, complete with the beret!

In other news, I made pancakes for my host family (Erin and I made a test batch before and we approved) and everyone loved them! It was a taste of home I didn’t know I missed and was so happy to share that with everyone. Additionally, I have been attending my host mom’s organization Alliance VITA for their weekly series Universitie de la Vie (University of Life) and went to see the film Joy with Alice and Jeanne and had a wonderful time!

One of my beloved French teachers here told me Tuesday that I was visibly happier this semester than last. She said that I participate more, that I am more energetic and brighter and that she’s happy that I stayed the second semester. It means so much that she noticed that and told me, as it gave me a chance to think about my semester thus far and evaluate how I’m feeling. I acknowledged that I really am happy here. It’s a crazy thing to go through a hard transition and start to see the fruits of that struggle months later. I am understanding a lot more French, have established friendships and ties to this city, making the most of my traveling experiences, and learning a ton about life, relationships, and me. I still crave more time for reflection, need more time for faith, and still desire to love France and this crazy experience more, the joy and love of life (bon vivants!) is definitely there and visible. And so I hope God will grant me even more blessings here and a real love for France and this experience. He is to thank for this joy and beauty in this experience, in addition to all the people, like my professor, who make this experience for me!

I can smell dinner, so I’m hoping that means it’ll be in my stomach soon, so I’ll talk to you later!

Love and Peace,

Jessica

Greetings!

I have officially exhausted the English-speaking countries I want to visit this year, which is exciting but sad because I love that English. Oh well. But that means I went to England!

Last week, I became frustrated with myself for not being spontaneous enough and for not having enough adventures here (which is a little crazy but whatever). So the logical response to these thoughts? Buy a plane ticket to London for 3 days later, obviously. So I basically text my friends in London and Oxford, told them I was coming and that I would love a tour guide! And before I know it, I was lost in London, eventually finding Abby. After making dinner, meeting her friends, and having a fun night in London, I made my way back to my hostel for the night. I mention it because this was the first time I figured out an entire trip myself (host mom still thinks I’m incapable of it but whateve) and stayed somewhere alone. It was successful and I left the next today to embark on a short but thorough tour of the main sites of London. I fell in love. British accents, beautiful buildings, amazing monuments I’ve been seeing FOREVER in books and pictures, finally right in front of my own eyes.  It is such a surreal experience visiting these places. Who am I that I get to see and do all of this? Also, MAJOR shout-out to Mom for making this happen through her support (both emotional and you know, financial. I’ll repay you… soon).

Buckingham Palace! Hello Queen Elizabeth!

Big Ben, big bus, big dreams

Tower Bridge (often misidentified as London Bridge)

After that fabulous day in London and a traditional fish and chips in London with Abby (ahhh my life!), I boarded a train for Oxford! After scaring my friends a little because my train was late, I was finally seeing the place Jackie and Emily have been talking about for months. We ate dinner and got milkshakes (hilarious moment when I just couldn’t comprend what was being said by the guy who worked there because my brain doesn’t understand English apparently (but it was okay because I do speak English and so does he so we could resolve our confusion unlike in France where there’s just confusion til I walk away)), we headed back to the school to see my other friend Piotr! And we finally called it a night after tea and a life talk with Jackie<3

The next day I got my personal tour of Oxford with Jackie and enjoyed walking, marveling, picture-taking, and chatting the whole way through. I was just so happy to see her and the place shes been telling me about for what’s felt forever. Miss her already! That night my amazing friends gathering for dinner in the hall and I got to see Keith! It was such an amazing feeling being surrounded with friends who love me in England, where they have made a home for themselves. That night Emily took me to the best mass I’ve been to in a while, because it was aimed for students and was a Jesuit priest and, best of all, was in English! Emily and I had hot chocolate after before meeting others to share the best late-night food I’ve eaten ever: chips (french fries/frites) with cheese and hummus. As Em said, it doesn’t sound good but it’s amazing. Totally agree. I found myself daydreaming about them the other day, which is weird and kinda concerning.

I boarded a bus back to the airport the next day (after Jackie and Emily both woke up to eat breakfast with me<3) and was back in Strasbourg on Monday in time to miss my classes and surprise my host sisters who didn’t know I went to London…? Haha anyway, it was an amazing amazing weekend and I was so so happy to have gone! Thank you so so much Abby, Jackie, Emily, and Piotr for showing me around your wonderful cities. Miss you all and wish you would come to Strasbourg:)

Cheers!

Coucou tout le monde!

I hope by this middle of January, we’ve all kept of New Year’s Resolutions if you made any and are enjoying this cold month with family, vacation, and hot chocolate. And bon courage to all those who are already back on the work/school grind.

This post is dedicated to my amazing friend who has appeared in this blog several times, Renata. Though we’ve always been in the same French class and have been friends since freshman year, we didn’t truly grow close until this semester abroad. She’s provided me with an unimaginable amount of advice, support, and laughter. It’s crazy that you can know someone for a while but it isn’t until something like this where you actually make a lifelong friend, confidant, and the other person in your équipe!

One of the many crazy selfies we have

On the (wrong) train back to our lodging

We adapted out photo taking to mimic statues. All. Over. (Chartes, France)

Anyway, as much as I could go on singing Renata’s compliments, this post is to say goodbye! I am very sad to see her leave Strasbourg, France yesterday after her semester abroad. In France, I spent most of my time with Renata, getting to know her host family, her real family (go skype and anecdotes), and Café Berlin. Not positive what I’m going to do without the other half of my team, but I know we just had the most amazing experience together, and her presence was absolutely instrumental to my success and adjustment here in France. Gonna miss you so much, Renata!

So, say hi to Dinand for me and go kick all of your courses’ butts this semester! Expect lots of Skype sessions, snapchats, and the popping up of pictures from our selfie and awkward picture albums. Love you!!

Jess

(Also you should know I’m listening to Let It Go by James Bay while writing this)

Bonne Année!!! Happy New Year!

I wish you all many blessings and joys as you enter the new year! (beware it’s a long one- but worth it!)

Last we left off, I was planning my vacation home (like, U.S., home) and was preparing to take the last of my exams. So that happened and I
did all my Christmas shopping (my favorite of which was a handmade little Alsacien house made of porcelain that you put a candle in to light it up- for my mom). Then came the packing, which I managed to do pretty impressively I’d say- everything into my backpack. It was an interesting thing, preparing to leave Strasbourg for Christmas, it almost felt like I was leaving home, and that was a strange feeling. I realized that though there were a lot of times that I said I wanted to leave and wanted my family and my country (and my language) back, I still really loved where I was in life, which is pretty awesome.

So our last dinner we ate with the soon-to-be priest who was staying with us for a few days, and I told my host family that my real family has no idea what they look like and that I needed a picture. So we all gathered in front of the sapin and took a family photo. Our friend the frère took a lot of pictures, so we have some funny candids, one of which (posted below) really describes the family I live with and love, especially the look Jeanne is giving her mom and the fact that my host dad is showing me that he has a little American flag on his sweatshirt. It’s a little crazy how much I love living here; I remember being so nervous that my host sisters wouldn’t like me or that Martin would always look at me like I was an intruder, or that Francois would always politely nod every time I said something, which I knew meant he didn’t understand one word that I had said. But I can’t believe the transformation from strangers to family we’ve had, and I am so immensely blessed by that, I hope by the end of the year, I will have communicated how strong that love is for them.

 Cubilles et moi  in the family picture, aren’t we cute???

(From left to right: Francois, me, Alice, Jeanne, Isabelle, Martin (in front), and Betrand)

Then us kinda just being normal (notice how Francois darts the second he can ;D)

Going home was an experience- I am proud to say that I successfully traveled completely alone and succeeded at it. I got to do all the travelly stuff and make it through customs and even chat with people on the plane a bit. But the best part of the travel was at American customs when the guard asked me what I was doing in France/how long I stayed/blabla and I had never been so happy to speak to someone ever. I was so full of joy to see my family and to be in my country and had the ability to speak with friendly people in our native language, you would have thought I had lived away for 5 years, not months. But I will not tell myself that what I was feeling is an overreaction because this is the craziest, scariest thing I have ever done and I am succeeding like a star.

Christmas at home was amazing. Exactly what I needed. I was so blessed to see so much of my family and  many friends between our annual Christmas party, mass, and gatherings. I baked French dessert (my family can testify that though I can make a mean yogurt cake and bredele, I still need some practice- ask Olivia about the mousse or mom about the dry dough…) and told everyone not to worry about my safety abroad due to the attacks. It was so nice chatting and seeing all the support I have at home and all the wonderful people that love me. I had a wonderful Christmas and great sejour aux Etats Unis.

Our own sapin!                                                

Leaving my family was incredibly hard, especially my mom. It is so sad to see someone else so upset over my actions, even if they are for my betterment or well-being. And I know my mom wants me to do this and knows I will benefit greatly from it, but it was really really hard sitting in the airport and watching my family walk away. It’s interesting because that is probably one of the saddest things I can think of that affects me, but it is so temporary and makes for one of the best things- reunion. Not to mention, we bit the bullet and bought my mom a plane ticket to France for April!

Getting to France to spend New Years in Paris and then go back home to Strasbourg was roughhhh. I loved being with new friends who were studying in Spain as well as with Renata, but I felt really upset about leaving home and Paris wasn’t exactly the remedy that I needed. Though I had a great New Years and rang in the year with amazing people and a sparkling Eiffel Tower, it wasn’t until the train to Strasbourg when I opened a text from a friend that I suddenly had this huge weight lifted off of me. Mary reflected my feelings exactly despite not knowing how I was feeling exactly: scared, and doubting that I should have gone back home, but worse, doubting the decision to go back to France. And her advice was amazing: “Tell God that. Tell him you’re scared and why you’re nervous and anxious.” She shared her own experience and I kid you not, I cried in the train as I felt amazing knowing that this was okay and feeling like I could finally let God into this hurt. I hope she doesn’t mind me sharing her words, but I want her and others to know that those words literally changed everything about how I was feeling. From that moment on, I started getting excited to see my host family, who, when I saw them, were incredibly welcoming and fun and I feel closer to them than ever (the kids were literally lined up at the door). I know that homesickness doesn’t go away overnight (and if it does, it’ll come back) but I can’t believe how blessed I am to live with this family and to have this opportunity to be challenged and stretched and for God to be with me the entire time. I hope that anyone abroad still unsure of what the heck they are doing would reach other to loved ones (or me!) because, as I thought, looking at the Eiffel Tower on New Years, this is the bravest thing I’ve ever done. And not only are we all going to get through this, but we’re going to flourish.

Um, so yeah, I needed to share maybe:) But I hope you all enjoyed that window to my soul and I am happy to report my level of joy here is a good one. So bonne nouvelle année and remember you’re loved!

Love and Peace-
Jessica

PS To everyone that has supported me even with half a word- I appreciate you more than you know.

Bonjour tout le monde!

I hope you are all well, and pushing through this finals week or getting ready for Christmas! I am also preparing for the last of my exams and have commenced worrying about Christmas gifts and getting excited to see my family and my country again.

I am currently sitting in a cafe and have already consumed tea, hot chocolate, and a pain au chocolat, but still have gotten no studying done. Somehow I can’t even distract myself intelligently with a substantial blog post, so I just wish everyone a great week and hope you enjoy the photos below!

Love and Peace!

Jessica

Strasbourg being it’s casual beautiful

Our Christmas Tree Chez-Cubille:)

Decorations (and help w my homework that night) courtesy of Jeanne

Delicious Alsacien dinner with friends!

Season’s Greetings from Christmas-y and chilly Strasbourg!

 (The giant sapin of Strasbourg)

This past week was a tough one, with a 10 page (single spaced) French paper on the history of this region of France and a Linguistics exam. I spent hours every day working on that paper, listened to “Let It Go” in seven different languages in succession, ate a lot of snacks, and didn’t sleep as much as I wished. But the paper was finished and I turned it in this morning (hopefully in the right mailbox…). So happy to be done!

It is crazy that Christmas season is upon us. In some ways, it very much feels like the season, but in others, it seems like the first day I came to France when time is frozen and I’m just stuck. But my host family did get a sapin, or a Christmas tree, and I watched “Love Actually” with Erin and a bunch of French people in the movie theater on Tuesday, so we’re getting there.  The Christmas markets (Marche du Noel) are also partout (everywhere) and remind us that it is the most wonderful time of the year!

Additionally, I’ve had some wonderful friends come to visit recently, Karla, Mariana, and now Tom, visiting from Dijon, which makes me feel right at home! Love you all<3

 (Me, Mariana, and Erin)

(It was a real fete, with treats,

decorating Christmas trees,

and lots of people!)

Let’s see, what’s been up? Well, Thanksgiving was really good, all the Holy Cross students went over our coordinator’s house and we had a traditional Thanksgiving Day dinner. We all made a dessert and I couldn’t believe how good everything was. I missed my family of course, but after a long dinner and even longer night over Renata’s laughing over children’s jokes and deep talking over tea, I really enjoyed the holiday.

(On the left is the day before Thanksgiving, me trying to make pumpkin/chocolate cake with an actual pumkin, no storebought puree in sight. On the right are some of my favorite people, Jose, Renata, and my little host brother, Martin, making MugCakes. You can see he’s warmed up to me a bit :D)

In other news, I have decided to retourner for the holidays! Honestly, one of my favorite parts of this is being able to sing “I’ll be home for Christmas” and get all excited. I really need a break of the unfamillar and get back to my beloved United States. But today, as I laughed and struggled through French with a friend from my host mom’s organization as the two of us stood in the middle of a plaza trying to survey the French and tourists alike, I realized I’ll be excited to come back to France after Christmas. Though it did hit me a little harder than expected when I deleted “Come Home!” on January 13th out of my phone’s calendar. But it’ll be a-ok.

Anyway, I have been struggling with faith a little bit this week, so I’m off to the Sacrament of Reconciliation at the Cathedrale to renew my spirit and heart and try to further align with God. Keep praying!

Hope you all are good and for those taking finals, hang in there, you can do it!!!

Love and Peace,

Jessica

Hey there!

I mentioned in my last post that I was on a bus to Amsterdam when I heard about the terrible attacks in Paris. For my response to that, look at the last post. As for this one, here’s a little reflection about Amsterdam!

I didn’t spend too much time in Amsterdam unfortunately, but it was an amazing time nonethelss. The bus was really long but it yielded amazing conversation with Renata that I couldn’t have planned for! We talked about everything from our vocations and life hopes to discrimination and music and a whole lot of jokes about Starbucks and generally a lot of jokes that were carried so long onlookers probably thought we were crazy (aka Efi and Quynh, <3). But that was such a great part of the trip!

So, Amsterdam. Upon arrival, I spent quite a bit of time on my phone answering the loving and concerned messages from family and friends in response to the Paris attacks. But at least we were warm and off a bus! And it was great to see Elena, who is studying in Cork, Ireland and was with us for the weekend.

Around 3am, I fell asleep only to wake up to Kelly Clarkson asking me to “Hear her” at 5:45am. So yay to 3 hours of sleep! But, we were prepped to profitez-bien and seize the day! And so we went out, figured out Amsterdam public transportation and maps (lol at my navigating skills). But it was all worth it when we got in line at the Anne Frank House museum. We were 45 minutes early for the opening, but by 9am, the line was outrageous, so kudos to Elena for planning well!

And boy, was the Anne Frank House a highlight of the trip. Absolutely heart-wrenching, the trip through the actual building that Anne Frank and her family hid in for 2 years during the Holocaust was an influential experience. It again begged the question of how to allow my life to matter and influenc the world. As one visitor put it, “We like to think this kind of thing will never happen again. But it could.” How do I act as part of the generation that prevents that? How do I “make her would-be’s my opportunities?”

After the visit, we walked around quite a bit, taking numerous pictures of all the canals and beautiful buildings before settling in to eat a pancake (Dutch pancake!) lunch. Then it was back out to searching the city for the iconic I Amsterdam sign, the bench from The Fault in Our Stars movie, and other tourist attractions. Lots of pictures and walking later, we stopped for a snack (Stroopwaffle!) and chatted amongst each other for a bit to get out of the rain that had started. And soon after was dinner and a train ride back to our Air BnB! We definitely made the most of the day, and it was a great time!

This week was actually pretty rough in terms of me being exhausted, some tough times, and long courses. But it’s Friday now and I’m feeling great! Have a wonderful weekend!

Love and Peace,

Jessica